Closing Time……Time for you to go out to the places you will be from

Blog #14
November 30th, 2011

Closing Time……Time for you to go out to the places you will be from

The semester is drawing to an end, and as I prepare to head home to New York in a couple of weeks, I wonder where the time has gone. I feel like I’m entering another transition stage, and being home is going to play a big part in the many important decisions I have coming up. Between eagerly searching for the last internship of my academic career and trying to figure out where I’ll be personally and professionally in September, I’m very overwhelmed with all the unknowns and lack of information I have at my disposal to make such decisions.

Closing time
Open all the doors and let you out into the world
Closing time
Turn all of the lights on over every boy and every girl.

Closing time
One last call for alcohol so finish your whiskey or beer
Closing time
You don't have to go home but you can't stay here.

Closing time
Time for you to go out to the places you will be from
Closing time
This room won't be open till your brothers or your sisters come.

So gather up your jackets, move it to the exits
I hope you have found a friend.
Closing time
Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end.

The first decision, what does this last internship mean to me and where will it lead? I’ve sent 25+ applications out to companies looking for a marketing/PR position and have heard nothing back. Beginning to get very frustrated of how slow the job search process is here. Everyone keeps telling me that it’s too early to expect to hear back for a position starting in March. This is difficult for me because I don’t live here and I’m already in a temporary state of being. I need to know in advance where I’ll be so I can make arrangements and budget accordingly.

This raises another question. Will the internship I do in Italy actual help my career in the United States? How likely is it that the job I have will transfer over that easily in today’s economy? The reason I question this is because I’ve been offered a very lovely position in Rome that pays well, finishes early so I’d have a summer, and could be rewarding on very personal level. However, the job is education based and not in my field. While I’m very passionate about the idea, it seems almost trivial to work so hard at this Masters in Business only to settle for a job outside of my “dream”. My concern is that when it’s all said and done, it won’t help me launch my marketing career, and could actually be a waste of time that I could have been using to rack up business experience. However, I could pass this opportunity up and get a business job that won’t help me in the United States anyway. It’s a very tricky spot to be in where I feel stuck in between my youth and desire to jump into adulthood.

The second decision regards my actual career. When I come home in September, I have to decide whether to focus my job search mainly in New York where I want to eventually settle down, or in Massachusetts where the cost of living will be lower and to be with Rob while he finishes up school. Realistically, most internationally based companies will be in New York City, but they’re a handful near Boston. I’m not sure if it’s worth starting something in a state that I’d leave in 1-2 years time. But moving straight to New York is also going to be difficult. I won’t be in a position to buy a house yet, and renting will make it impossible to save anything.

The third decision which ties into decision one and two is about Rob and starting our life together. When is the right time? I have reasons to rush it and get married next year and reasons to wait a little longer (until he’s done with school). It seems like we’re both going to have to compromise on a lot of things in order to meet both of our career needs, which seems to be the main issue right now. They’ll definitely be some major compromising when I get home. My prediction is that I’m going to have to give up a few things I want for the first 2 years in order to win some bigger battles in the long-term. It also seems like I have the more flexible of the situations come September.

The point is that there are so many unknowns, but I can’t help but have this feeling that when I go home for Christmas, a floodgate of answers will open. I just wish I had a better understanding of the cards in my deck before I played my next hand. For now, all I have are plans A, B, C,…followed by variations of each A.1, A.2, etc. I like the line in the song where it says “Time for you to go out to the places you will be from.” I’ve always found that to be a very profound way of looking at life. Whether we’re talking about geography or not, the unknown place we are going could be the place that defines who we become.

Jackie <3